The Musings of a Work in Progress

Seeds for Transformation

The Power of Change

February 11, 2018

2017 brought on a significant amount of change into my life. In late 2016, I went to a retreat with a group of Shamanic Practitioners and that event changed me. Although I knew about Energy Work, had dabbled in Reiki and was experiencing my awakening, I soon found out how much I didn’t know. The weekend spent with these six women was incredible. We met on the Outer Banks of North Carolina, during a weekend where Hurricane Matthew came barreling through. The weekend, the energy and the bond I made with these women was so powerful, I knew I needed to push harder to find my footing on this path for my new journey.

After that experience, those of us who weren’t already Shamanic Practitioners took a course with the woman who organized the first retreat. This was a Multi-Cultural program with a heavy influence of Peruvian Shamanism as taught by Dr. Alberto Villoldo. This year-long process was the best thing I have ever done.

The work was difficult, as any change can be. While the experience and results are different for everyone, I walked away from this program having shed things that therapy could not touch. I was no longer waking up and wondering what “I wanted to be when I grow up”. I had a clear path and vision as to what my purpose and work here is. I was in touch with Spirit (God Energy) and I understood my place on the Earth and within the Divine. My relationships with those aligned to my path have flourished, abundance in all forms is coming in and I have harnessed my healing gifts to be able to help others.

If anyone would have told me what was to come after that fateful Hurricane filled weekend, I would have said they were crazy. I wasn’t going to go. I was in the midst of a major depressive episode, I had lost my job and thought I didn’t have the money to spend, I was being asked to share a room and a house with people I didn’t know and I had panic attacks the whole way driving there. But I pushed through, I listened to my “gut” that told me I had to be there. I let go and trusted that it would all work out and it did. Better than my limited human mind could ever hope.

I know change is hard, I know fear and ego are pounding at your door telling you all the reasons you can’t and why you shouldn’t try, I know friends and family may not understand or be supportive. But change is possible and it can bring things you could never even imagine. I challenge you to let go of the control, let go of the fear. If the idea of a big change is too much to handle, start small, get comfortable with the idea. If you are a creature of habit like me and like to use the same cup every morning for your coffee because routine gives you comfort; tomorrow use a different cup. If you take the elevator to your office, take the stairs instead. A little change can be powerful, a big shift can be life-changing.

I wish you all the best on your journey.


Tell Your Story!

March 4, 2018

Telling your story is a powerful tool for transformation. We all have stories to tell, some good, some bad but they are ours. They are the truth of our experience and the message beyond the scars. Telling our story can be cathartic, if we are telling it from a place of healing; not from a place of fear, pain, anger and anguish.

When I first heard that I needed to tell my story from a place of healing, I didn’t understand. I identified with my story. It was my blood, sweat and tears, I lived it. I was a survivor and wanted to tell the world they could survive too. It was great that I was telling my experience so others would know they were not alone… or was it?

When I would repeat the tales, I thought I felt better and thought I was helping. But was I really? Each time I repeated the things that happened, I was reliving it on an emotional level. As I told my story, I felt it in every cell and it kept me rooted in the experience, reopening the wound and causing almost as much pain as the original event. I had trapped myself in an endless loop of pain and discomfort and I didn’t even know it.

Once I did work to heal the stories, I began to see the difference. I could tell the story as a factual event. The experience went from “Look what happened to me!” to a place of “Yeah, that happened, but it doesn’t define me and it doesn’t own me anymore.” That’s the place of wisdom rather than the place of pain, fear and anger.

The world is waiting to hear your story, how you choose to tell it is up to you. I challenge you to find your story in the place of healing, it is empowering and it’s your truth. Let the experiences live in the past where they belong, they no longer need to own or define you. You are worthy of so much more!

I wish you all the best on your journey.


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